Why am I blogging about this? Two reasons: 1) It’s a relatively slow news day; and 2) It’s just too weird to ignore. Doesn’t Sammy know it’s cool to be black thanks to the election of Lincoln-Jesus? Get with the program, Sammy.

Sammy Sosa stunned fans last year when he turned up at the Latin Grammys with noticeably whiter skin. The home run legend claimed he’d mistakenly used a cosmetic cream with an unintended bleaching effect. But last weekend at club Liv at the Fontainebleau in Miami Beach, “Sosa looked back to his usual color and was partying with friends until the early hours,” said a spy.

Here’s a side-by-side comparison of Sosa before and after the cream. Note to Sammy Sosa: Leave your skin alone in the future. You look fine as you are, and the post-cream was…just creepy.